'Twas the Night Before X-Mas - Rock Star Style!

'Twas the night before Christmas, when all thro' the mansion,
Not a creature was stirring, ‘sept Marty, who was dancin’;

The guitars were hung by the wall with great care,
In hopes that dear Dave and Timmy soon would be there; The rockers were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of Suzie’s danc'd in their heads, And Brooke in her gown, and JD in his cap,
Had long settled their brains for a year long’s nap -- When out by the pool there arose such a clatter,
MiG sprang from the bed to see what was the matter.
Away to the window he flew like a flash, Tore open the shutters, and threw up the sash.
The moon on his breast shine like new fallen snow,
Gave the lustre of mid-day to objects below;
When, what to his wondering eyes should appear,
But an 80s band that’s been missing its singer, With a old Aussie driver, so lively and slim,
He knew in a moment it must be St. Tim. More rapid than eagles the singers they came,
And he whistled, and shouted, and call'd them by name:
"Now! Suzie, now! Jordis, now! Heather, and Tara,
"On! Brandon, on! Daphna, on! Neil, and Dana;"
To the top of the porch! to the top of the wall!"
Now dash away! dash away! dash away all!" As dry leaves before the wild hurricane fly,
When they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky;
So up to the house-top the coursers they flew,
With the sleigh full of Toys -- and St. Gary Beers too:
And then in a twinkling, the rockers heard on the roof
The prancing and pawing of each little hoof.
As MiG drew in his head, and was turning around,
Down the chimney St. Dave Navarro came with a bound: He was dress'd in Brooke Burke, from his head to his foot,
And his hair was quite tarnish'd with ashes and soot;
His bundle of "toys" was pressed on her back,
And she look'd like a peddler barely touching his sack:

His eyes -- how they twinkled! his tattoos how merry,
His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry;
His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow.
And the feathers of his boa was as white as the snow;
Shiny silver rings hung from each nipple
Were so big, they could be called “size-triple”.
He had a bearded face, and a bare chest
That wasn't even covered by a black vest: MiG giggled and cheered, like a right jolly elf,
Marty laugh'd when he saw him in spite of himself; A wink of Marty’s eye and a twist of his head
Soon let poor MiG to know he had nothing to dread.-XS spoke not a word, but went straight to their work,
To find their new lead singer; would they pick “a jerk”? Tim laid his finger to the side of his nose
And then said “Yer riot fir INXS” as he chose. INXS sprung to their sleigh, new guy in tow,
And away they all flew, to start a tour show: The others heard them exclaim, ere they drove out of sight --
Rockin’ Christmas to all, and to all a good night.