Battle of the Boys - Round 4: The Thongs

Marty: Dude, are you still avoiding eye contact with me?

JD: Why don't you just leave me alone?

Marty: Oh...getting a little touchy are we? Feeling a little emasculated, are we?

JD: Ya know what? I'm just gonna go, that's what I'm gonna do...I'm just gonna go.
JD: Here's the thong I got from a fan after finishing Money. You can't tell me it's not fucking hot as hell.

Marty: It's very nice.

JD: Very nice? It's fucking pink with yellow flower-type shit on the string parts! It's like stripper gear!

Marty: :sighs: It's a girl's thong.

JD: What, would you gather a dude's?

Marty; No, idiot, I mean it's the type of thong a girl would wear. Someone who's a tease; inexperienced and not actually intending to let a guy get an up close and personal look at her in said thong.

JD: What are you getting at?

Marty: What I'm getting at is that the thong you're holding very likely belongs on a thirteen year old girl. ...Now, the thong I got for my performance of Trees is a different story...

Marty (cont): It is a simple black g-string without any special effects, so to speak.

JD: So your little panty-throwing fan was boring and up-tight.

Marty: On the contrary, this is the undergarments of a woman. She is a lady who knows what she wants, how to get it, and what to do with it once she's got it.

JD: So you're saying a chick in something like that is more likely to put out?

Marty: If that's the way you would like to put it, yes. A woman who wears something like this wants to have sex and, apparently, she wants to have it with me.

JD: ...Still, I have fans willing to throw panties at me!

Marty: Yeah, too bad you'd go to jail for trying to get into any of 'em...